Aldi is addictive. Like a black hole, it draws you in and while you are wandering around the edge browsing you’re fine (although you are cruising at slower speed of time compared to back on Earth, ie. Every shopping trip ever) but as soon as you are sucked in, you are gone for good!
So you dabble shopping there once or twice, not committing, a few things here and there. They have pretty good prices, kick ass gluten free products and really cheap almond milk. Then all of a sudden, every week they suck you in to buying an abundance of rad things you may (but mostly don’t) need. Not only do they have specials, they have them twice a week! TWICE!
So herein lies the problem, the specials. Last week they had Bonds zippies and Dr Seuss books. You think there was ANY trace of this ever happening at our (and I am sure many other) store/s? nope. Not one thread of cotton! This is actually pretty crappy as I heard down the mumma-line that people were buying huge amounts and reselling them on facebook swap and sell sites, YOU JERKS! (I just wanted one, you know the mint green one with the fluro dinosaurs, super cute hey!).
Anyhoo, these sales, they suck you in twice a week, you go to find that awesome bargain and Baboom! it’s not there (sob sob… I missed the food processor this week too). So you walk around without (or if you’re lucky with!) your catalogue highlighted treasure, and then you find more things to add to your trolley. Really cute things that will just make your life that much better! Which is fine, enjoy, life is short my friends… But then one day you move… read my post about moving here . You think really, did I need all this? (I just unpacked some kitchen boxes, and found three sets of kitchen canisters!)
So your trolley is now filled with random delights and a succulent or two. You get to the counter and start unloading your trolley. While your lovely mini assists by either a) eating items b) throwing items on the floor or c) creepily staring at the person behind you so they start making ‘ahh boo’ noises and distract you from your unloading, you notice you can’t keep up with the speed of your groceries flying toward the counter… ‘what is this all about?’ you think… you look ahead and see an 80 yr old woman with her gorgeous European leather shopping cart with goods flying everywhere! As she strenuously tries to keep up with the ridiculous speed of scanning by the attendant, she manages to pack her items and look up with an exasperated look on her face, poor love 😦
So now it’s your turn. Did I say you had a trolley above, no sorry, I meant pram, you have a pram. It begins… Mr Competing-in-the-Jerky-Mc-Jerk-Olympics-how-fast-can-I-possibly-go-to-cause-everyone-an-anxiety-attack starts throwing your items around like a mad man. The canned food gets chucked on the strawberries, he puts meat on your bananas, you’re throwing things on, around and under your poor child. Half way through you frantically trying to unstack the Empire State sized pile overflowing on the edge of the counter, he turns and looks at you. ‘That’s $$$$ how are you paying?’
What, how much, paying, but, groceries, everywhere! Your child has already torn open the flour and started to paint it all over his face/pram/old lady who’s still recovering in front of you.
‘That’s $$$$ how are you paying?’
Yes, I heard you the first time!!
LIKE WHAT THE HELL?!?!
You then spend twenty minutes trying to load your pram Tetris style, while mini is grizzling in the background as your reality of popping in for 15 minutes (edge of Black Hole time) turns in to an hour (Earth time)! You walk away stressed and confused and say you will never go again… until next week’s catalogue comes out! 😉
Seriously, is it just me or do you guys have intense Aldi attendants too??
xx
Healthy Little Wonders 